Thursday, March 3, 2016

Storytelling, Know The One You're With: The Introduction PART I Week 7



Know Who You're With: The Introduction


"I'm going to marry him. I don't care what anyone says," Brittany said as she roughly brushed her hair while looking in her vanity mirror.

"I DESERVE TO BE HAPPY! I didn't ask for this life, and I refuse to not get this man to marry me. Deontae is so fine, and I'm going to make him mine. Period."

That next day at work, Brittany made sure that she wore the skirt that hugged her curves the best, made sure sure that her curls were on point, and that she wore her new ColourPop lipstick, called Subduction. 

Brittany got in the car and was on her way to get her man. While listening to her favorite Jazmine Sullivan song, she looked in her rearview mirror and said to herself, "Go get your man, girl."

After giving herself a pep talk, she parked, got out of her car, grabbed her purse and business bag and walked in to work.

"Hey Alicia, what's on the agenda today?" Brittany asked the office secretary as she put sugar into her cup of fresh black coffee.

"Well, it looks like you and Deontae have a presentation today at 11, followed by a luncheon and then a few off site calls."

Brittany felt her plan being put into motion and tried to contain her mischievous excitement.

"Hey Deontae, you ready for this presentation today? I hear all of the big shots will be there."

"What's going on, Brittany! Yes, I'm ready. We're more than prepared to rock their world!"

"You don't even know the half," Brittany thought to herself.

"Well, let's go do it!"

Brittany and Deontae headed to the lecture hall, gave their presentation and impressed everyone that was in attendance.

"Wow, you did a great job up there, Brittany!" Deontae said as they walked down the hall to the luncheon.

"Thanks, love! So did you! Hey, you want to just skip the luncheon and get a head start on these off site calls?"

"Yeah, that sounds like a plan.  Let me just go get the keys and we can head out!"

The two headed out to the offsite office visits and engaged in small talk unrelated to the office.

Fast Forward to 6:00pm after the offsite office visits

"Well, I think we accomplished what we needed to there today, don't you think?" Deontae asked Brittany while walking back to the car. 

"Yeah! We did awesome! I'm really glad I got to do this with you today!" said Brittany as she softly caressed his arm. 

"You want to go get a bite to eat, De? I'm starving after all this hard work today! I know a nice little spot off of Peachtree that has the best soul food."

Suddenly intrigued by the offer, Deontae responded saying, "Soul food?! Say no more, tell me which way to go."

Brittany felt her plan starting to go into full effect. Right when the two crossed the threshold into the restaurant, Brittany turned her professional side off and the subtle seductive side on. 


"So, De, why haven't we hung out like this more often? We're clearly enjoy each other's company, yes?"

Deontae took a sip of his Whiskey Sour and responded, "You know, I've been thinking the same thing. I actually was going to invite you to dinner last month, but you just disappeared on me."

Brittany replied, "Yeah, I just had to take care of a few things for a bit. But I'm back now, better than ever... Better. Than. Ever." 

As the evening grew, Deontae and Brittany's conversation got deeper and more engaging with each sip, bite, and laugh they shared. 

That following month, Brittany and Deontae were an item and everyone at the office knew it. 

But there was one piece of the story Brittany failed to mention. The time that Brittany spent away from the office, she was actually in Paulview Psychiatric Facility for displaying psychotic tendencies... #KnowWhoYoureWith

Stay tuned for part II

Story Source: Folk Stories From Southern Nigeria by Elphinstone Dayrell (1910).


Author's Note: This particular story written below currently has two parts, and it is based upon the Nigerian story entitled, The Pretty Girl Who Killed the Kingby Elphinstone Dayrell (1910). After reading the story, of course, I took it all in, in it's entirety, but the very last sentence stuck out to me. That last sentence shaped the direction I wanted to take in both the story below, as well as the one written as part two. I wanted to break this story into two parts because I really wanted to paint a picture and to set up the background of the story and the two main characters, Brittany and Deontae, in order for the reader to be on the same wave length as me. The inspirational sentence for this story is "Never marry a stranger, no matter how pretty she may be." These words can actually be words to live by each day, whether it be marriage, relationships, and even friendships. This sentence, or more so quote, can be interpreted however you see fit for any situation! 

In the original story, the "pretty girl" was actually a witch that was paid to kill the king of a neighboring town that was tormenting the people of another village. This king was making each day for the other villagers absolute hell. So, one day, the other villagers decided that they were going to put an end to their torture and have the king taken care of. The villagers decided to pay a witch to shape shift into an attractive young woman, seduce the king, marry him, and then behead him in his sleep. She managed to do this and slip away completely undetected. No one in that village suspected it was her because she was so beautiful and the last person to commit such a heinous crime. It was from that very last part that I coined this story's hashtag, #KnowWhoYoureWith. My story isn't identical to the original story. 

3 comments:

  1. Man this story ends with such a cliff hanger! It was a really good read and I thought you wrote it well. After Brittany gave her self the pep talk in the car about getting her man I was starting to wonder about her. I am not sure that is the way things should work. Manipulation, however subtle, can be a recipe for disaster in my opinion. She doesn't sound too psychotic though, which kind of makes it even scarier. I wonder if Deontae has any idea that she might have a few screws loose. I like that you are making it a two part story because I didn't want it to end and not see where their relationship went. I thought the style you chose to write it in was very good and made it feel authentic. Great Job overall!

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  2. Wow! I had visited your blog to comment on some of your storytelling and remembered loving it. Then, when we had free choice for the portfolios, I was excited to see yours!
    I love how relatable this story is. I think everyone can identify with trying to seem attractive and win over the affections of someone of the opposite sex. Also, the dialogue was great! I don't know if you meant to or not, but your entry really spoke a story of female empowerment to me. The fact that she asked him out and was so strong in her will was great. I can't wait to read the second part!

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  3. Hi Bri! I thought this story was written so well! It was so creative and in such a real life setting. I loved the use of words you used and the descriptions. Some of my favorite lines from your story include :
    “She wore the skirt that hugged her curves the best”
    “and that she wore her new ColourPop lipstick, called Subduction”
    “mischievous excitement”
    “were an item”
    I’m glad Btittany got her man! However, I was so caught off guard that her time spent away from the office was actually spent in a psych facility for psychotic tendencies! Plot Twist! I wonder what other psychotic tendencies she has? Her plan to make Deontae her man seemed liked something a thirsty girl would do! However, I can see herself doing more crazy things! I can’t wait to read part two of this story! Great job Bri, keep up the excellent and hard work!

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